As I stare at my reflection, I am unchained by the overflow of gratitude that swells in my chest, that gives birth to hope, in my ability to perceive beauty that was once lost on me. Now, I see strength in my weakness and a warrior in shadow that is my past. Oddly enough, I had to experience pain to feel this free.
I’m no longer trapped or perhaps lost, in the smog of my past. I’ve connected and accepted that courageous, rejected, lonely little girl. I’m more than I thought, but less than what others expected. I am no longer surprised by my need to be forgiven, perfection and I are distant friends.
I locked myself in a prison that I thought was life and it is that perception that held me restrained until God released me.
Life isn’t always as we perceive it. Why is it that you are surprised that you needed to be forgiven?
Society lies and anxiety is the devil; they both work to confine you. Society synonymous with anxiety is the anvil that holds you down within yourself. I’ve come to understand that we wouldn’t have anxiety if we didn’t care so much about society. The key to life is to break free from the expectations that you’ve allowed others to impose on you. Then, you can see the beauty that lies in your imperfections. But, before then, you’ll underestimate your need for grace and therefore be unable to accept it freely.
I’m learning to embrace my imperfections. I spin, and I make bad decisions. I have character flaws and triggers, but thankfully grace covers them all so I can let go.
Your problem is you want to figure it all out, but life happens in the gray, it’s not black or white. ~ Brave